What do you get...

...when you take the stomach flu, roll it into horrific near deadline misses you have little to no control over, add a pinch of 2nd round interview notification anxiety, on top of mounds of work you can't possibly get done, with a side of about 40 female MBA students from across the country, a sprinkle of free sneakers and dinners, a dash of resurfacing Assholes and Boy Toys, and top it all off with a Lindsay Lohan sighting? Throw it all in a pot, bring to a rolling boil and, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the past 5 days of my life.

I'm too tired to plot it all out detail by detail right now, but the above recipe sums it up rather nicely.